Life is circular. As I alluded to in a recent post, the natural seasons change as do the seasons of life. What goes around typically comes around.
As a parent, I take particular delight in watching my adult children experience some of the moments we faced while raising them – especially my two gals who have young children in their homes and incur the never ending cycle of the day to day ups and downs which come along with the territory.
I affectionately like to think of this as “payback time” for the shades of gray and sparsely covered terrain I now carry on top of my head!
I had to laugh at a desperate sounding, humorous plea for help which my daughter, Jessica, posted on Facebook recently in response to the daily encounters of raising Danalyn, her three year old daughter.
I have to give credit where credit is due – she was her creative self in sharing with her “friends” the challenges of the particular day.
If any of you are looking for work and are good with kids, you might want to consider the following “Help Wanted” opportunity:
Jessica’s husband was out of town on business and she is still getting used to the new demands of their almost three month old son, Garrett, in addition to being Mommy to a very active and inquisitive toddler.
My educated guess is that although the transition curve is getting better, it is a moment-by-moment juggling act to keep the ship sailing on smooth seas.
Some days might be more challenging than others if memory serves me correctly!
Personally, I see it as a sign of intelligence when a child asks “why”, albeit if it is over and over and over – even if it is much to the chagrin of the parents listening to the “song that never ends”.
In an article by Jeanna Bryner, Why Kids Ask Why, she infers that kids aren’t trying to exasperate Mommy and Daddy with the unending stream of questions, they simply want to understand.
In a 2009 study by the Society for Research in Child Development, the results indicated when preschoolers ask “why” questions, they’re not merely trying to prolong conversation, they’re trying to get to the bottom of things.
When Danalyn visited us a few weeks ago we were thrilled to be with her. If I had a dollar for every time she asked “why” while visiting us, I could most likely purchase a nice accessory for my bike or pay for a fancy evening out on the town.
I do empathize with her Mommy and the reason for her “Help Wanted” ad.
If I had to guess, there came a time in most of our lives when the flame of asking “why” was extinguished.
If the flame wasn’t extinguished maybe it was set to the pilot light position – turned down until needed.
Perhaps it occurred due to the action of an overly exasperated parent.
Maybe it was diminished by a teacher who did not care.
It could have occurred by a simple loss of heart.
Whatever the reason, we might do ourselves a favor and re-ignite the flame.
Seeking answers leads us to exploration and growth.
Instead of caving into the thought of “what will be, will be”, we might dare to explore an answer to a burning question or concern.
The process of learning is most likely worth more than the answer we might be seeking.
How do we encourage asking “why” in a practical way?
- This might come via reading an article or a book.
- It could come by stepping out on the waters and seeking the advice of someone (qualified) who might be able to help.
- It could come as an answer to an honest prayer.
- Slowing down long enough to catch our breath, be still, and allow for reflective thought could be the payday we seek.
I certainly do not have all the answers and am navigating a few ships at sea as I seek to learn some answers to “why” questions of my own.
In what ways can you re-ignite the flame of asking “why” questions to foster your own personal growth?
Please feel free to share in the comments. Thanks for reading!
Oh how I can clearly remember those days and relate to that help wanted ad! Very creative and oh so true. I definitely also relate to having that flame in the pilot light position much of the time. Actually in coaching people I have had to ask more questions and so that has helped me as well to start just looking deeper at things in my own life I would’ve just accepted before. As always Bruce – a thoughtful post.
I think I need to affirm a deeper appreciation for the day to day strains on Jackie as she raised our children….not easy, but worth the investment.
oh, enjoy and cherish the exasperating “why” days as all to soon they change. No longer will they ask you why but will tell you what for!
Jen – ain’t that the truth! Thanks for commenting!