Few people may know this about me – there once existed a deep desire inside of me for Jackie and I to have another child.
The truth of the matter is the desire never died, it simply went unfulfilled.
For reasons I won’t elaborate on here we chose to have as our family (actually, they were chosen for us!) our three wonderful daughters, Jessica, Bethany, and Brittany.
They will always be held in our hearts as the treasures they are – each of them a gift given to us by God with their unique talents, gifts, and personalities. As an added bonus we now get to enjoy their spouses and children as well!
You may think the desire for a fourth child was to finally give birth to a son.
Someone to rough house with or to toss a football. Perhaps, but this assumption would not be accurate. Those reasons will remain undisclosed and kept in house.
However, I received a boy with the generational gift of the birth of our first grandson earlier this year. Very cool!
Honestly, if we had a fourth daughter I would not have minded at all.
If she were born today and if the naming rights were left solely to me, I would have named her Zoe.
“What’s with that?” you might be thinking. “Has he been watching too many movies lately? Zoe? Really?”
Yes, really!
I decided to Google the origin of the name, Zoe. Derived from the Greek, the name means “Life”.
Given that we share in common the human condition, my educated guess is there are plenty of things in your day-to-day world as there are in mine that simply rob of us “Life” or at least the life we could be living.
- Things that suck us dry.
- Things that empty our tank.
- Things that make us feel like we have a dull toothache and constantly need a shot of novocaine to make it through the day.
What follows is not an exhaustive list. See if any of the things noted ring a bell with you:
- Laundry, the never ending piles of it that might be lying around your house, making you feel like you live in the Rockies.
- The dance steps labeled, “cleaning-grocery shopping-paying bills-running your children to “this, that, and the other thing”-doing your part at church-caretaking for your elderly Mom”.
- Since we are “Dancing with the Stars” should I add another song or two or three?
- The battery in the car died again! Again?
- The checking account is overdrawn and OD fees are pending. Seriously!
- How about the fight you had with your husband last night? Draining?
- Better yet, I am sure your workplace existence is like walking on the surface of the moon. Didn’t the guys on the Apollo missions come a across a place called The Sea of Tranquility? Sounds like a place we might want to visit on the next rocket launch! Does one depart tonight?
- Lastly, what about the thought, “if-anyone-asks-me-to-do-one-more-thing-I-think-I-am-going-to-explode”. Sounds like that might be one for the “zap me” column.
What’s the solution? Is there a solution?
You betcha!
For starters, I suggest the following visits with Zoe:
- The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul. (Psalms 23:1-3)
- He stilled the storm to a whisper. The waves of the sea were hushed. (Psalms 107:29)
- Be still, and know that I am God! (Psalms 46:10)
Seems like there might be a clue in the content – seek some quiet.
“No kidding genius, weren’t you that one that penned the above list? How do you suppose I do that?” is a thought you might be thinking. OK, I will give you that one!
The solution, as simple as it may sound, is found in being INTENTIONAL.
God is all about the practical when He leads you to the life His word provides:
- Turn off the TV.
- Go to bed early.
- Go shoot some hoops.
- Rock your baby or child to sleep, look into their closed eyes, and soak in the moment.
- Tell your family “do not disturb” and lock yourself away with a good book, preferably one that adds to your life count.
- Get up early or stay up late and seek the out the silence. Do nothing but listen to nothing.
- My favorite, sit by a running stream surrounded by woods.
- Let your husband know it’s OK if he doesn’t go to the mall with you this time.
- Insert ear buds and play some relaxing music.
- Since your husband got out of going to the mall, ask him to do the dishes and tend to the kids while you take a bubble bath.
- Ouch, here’s one. Turn your cell phone, your tablet, your computer, and social media to the OFF position. It’s OK to be anti-social and unpopular for more than a few minutes. The friends can wait (and so can work – more posts coming soon on this topic!)
Jackie and I will not be having another baby. That would be an event of biblical proportions for the two of us (think of us as a tad bit younger than Abraham and Sarah, but nonetheless not having any more kiddos!).
However, any time Zoe wants to dwell with me I am all for her charms.
It is a promise given:
The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy.
My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life. (John 10:10)
What can you do to invite Zoe into your world, if even for a periodic visit? She will grow on you, make her home in you.
I challenge you to try something, anything, so that your needle points more toward “F” than it does toward “E”.
Again, Bruce, your post touches me deeply! Being Greek – I knew the meaning of Zoe immediately and I love the idea of just inviting “her” into my life daily! When I pray scriptures that have the word life – I use zoe. I recommend taking time every, single day – even if it’s 5 minutes – to reboot – and your suggestions were wonderful. I have my time with the Lord every morning – I get up at 4 am so I can have that time before anyone else gets up! And I do things for short spurts throughout the day to bring Zoe into my day. My goal each day is to make a positive difference in someone’s life – to be a blessing to my family, friends and all who cross my path and to bring glory to God. Thank you for another wonderful post!
By the way – when I had my younger son Matthew – a nurse in the hospital came to me saying I must be so disappointed I had another boy. Honestly – I had had an ectopic pregnancy between Matt and Christopher and I was thrilled beyond words with my healthy, gorgeous little boy and the thought never crossed my mind. God did bless us with our Elizabeth 6 years later and I wouldn’t trade her for the world, but especially having lost 2 (we had a miscarriage between Matt and Lizzie), healthy, happy, wonderful kids was all I wanted!
Ann….may your day be filled with ZOE today! John 10:10 style! Thanks for sharing part of your tapestry….we’ll talk with you soon…Bruce
Hey, Bruce!! You hit the nail on the head. It is so hard to think with so much noise going in your head and all around you. It could be summed up with just STOP. STOP everything you’re doing and sit down and think. Write. Even if you do not consider yourself a writer. Get a journal.
You must write your thoughts down so you can see many of them at one time. You can only think of one thought at a time. But by writing—you can see many. You’re doing a great job with this concept and congratulations on counting your days up!! BTW, I am right behind you. 21,484 and counting!!